Study Shows Social Media Reduces Stress for Woman, So Start Tweeting

By Betch Waldorf

Finally, science does something that is actually fucking productive for our social lives. Scientists at “Pew’s Research Center” conducted a study of social media habits and stress levels in hopes of proving that the two are directly related. And they kinda did discover that it is true, but not for women. And, let’s be real, that’s all that really fucking matters.

Apparently, women thrive and reduce stress through social media in three main ways.

  1. We get “supportive exchange” through social media. Basically, all your friends retweet that really deep, sentimental quote you used and you feel so much better about yourself. Everyone knows that real friends like all your fucking instagram posts. That’s just like, the rules of feminism. “Sometimes you just have to know when to move on. #truth” RT for therapeutic reasons, obvi.
  2. Who conducted this study also said that since women are the people who maintain the family relationships and social media helps that. Basically, it makes it easier for menopausal soccer moms to stalk their teenage daughters activity on Facebook and ground them in a more efficient manner.
  3. Also, since there are so many poor, unfortunate souls out there who can’t afford a fucking therapist or a shit ton of Xanax, social media is a way for women to express themselves. Sharing is the key to stress reduce, which was surprising since I always just assumed it was marijuana. Whatever. Tomato, tamato.

Women who used social media an “average” amount were 21% less stressed than those who didn’t use social media, and let’s be real, if you’re reading this site, you are using at least an average amount of social media.

Not that we really gave a shit before, but now we have an excuse for our over active social media presence - we’re reducing stress, so go fuck yourself haters.




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