January 10, 2014
Just when you thought the founder of Snapchat couldn't embody the essence of douchebag even more (according to the internet and my friend whose friend used to date him pre-Snapchat), he probssss hooked up with Taylor Swift on New Years Eve. The main reason I believe this rumor is because she was for sure at the Snapchat NYE party, and why the hell would she go there if not for a guy? She could've gone to probably any party in the world (except mine), yet she chose the Snapchat one.
I'm practically Kristen Wiig levels of SURPRISED right now because Taylor Swift totally epitomizes the girl who never loses herself in relationships. From John Mayer to the Kennedys to hot dude to jumps around a lot to Silicon Valley...a totally logical, consistent progression right?
Honestly the main reason this bothers me is not just because Taylor can do soooo much better, but because if Evan Spiegel's ego gets any larger I'm genuinely afraid there will not be enough room for the planet to contain it and we'll literally have no other option but to colonize the moon. However I am excited for the breakup anthem. Hopefully it won't disappear after 10 seconds.