January 28, 2015
TSwift's Twitter and Instagram got hacked this morning and it gave us all a well deserved break from looking at her fucking cats.
The hackers are these sketch ass people called "The Lizard Squad" and have supposedly hacked/fucked over companies like Playstation. Seems like an interesting transition to go from major corporation to a fucking pop singer, but whatever. The Lizard Squad is clearly an even bigger crossover artist than Tswift.
In an obvious twist, the hackers are supposedly rooted in our favorite vacation spot, North Korea. Honestly, give it a fucking rest Kim Jong. We get it, truly. Congrats on hacking a girl who just decided to step out of her granny panty bathing suits last week- that must have been a true feat. Little does he know that the 13 year "swifties" of the world are more ferocious than our Marines.
The hackers also threatened to leak nude photos of Taylor, which I'm sure don't exist. Taylor Swift is waaaaaay to much of a goodie two shoes to snap a nudie. Why do you think she is constantly getting dumped?
I hope they hack Miley next, I bet she has some interesting photos for the world to see. It's officially the Hacking Games, may the nudes be ever in your favor.