March 5, 2014
If you’re a betch you basically majored in talking shit which means you got a minor in passive aggression. For this reason, we’re dedicating this post to one of our favorite abbrevs, one that combines both of these skills into three little letters: TBH.
TBH literally means “to be honest,” but when you’re using it you’re really being as honest as Vitamin Water is actual water: only half at best.
Like, yes you couldddd use TBH to express your genuine opinions, like “I thought Yeezus was harder to get through than my freshman year 8:30am class tbh,” but much like family reunions, it’s best when you’re trying to shadily be a bitch.
TBH is a very, very close relative to “it’s like, whatever,” so you could use them interchangeably but the upside is it’s a lot shorter so you get the same amount of passive aggression with less strain on your fingers. Also, unlike 'it's like, whatever" TBH is newer, trendier, and ever so slightly bitchier while seemingly innocuous. For example, you'd use TBH after saying way ruder comments like "there's definitely no way I'm coming to pick you up tbh", which you coudln't really ever do with "it's like whatever". We call that a win.
A few points to note when employing TBH:
Understatement is key. Think about how pissed you are and then figure out how to express that in the most non-committal way possible. Use the most wishy-washy adjectives you can think of. Some of our faves include: interesting, okay, dece, so shut the fuck up, and like, whatever. Example:
“Yeah that dress looks okay but I preferred the other one tbh.”
Translation: Take that off right now and burn it, or else we’ll start calling you Muffin Top McGee.
Be indirect. You’re not trying to DTR, so don’t get to the point—get around it. For this technique, opposites are your friend. Don’t openly admit to feeling one way or another; describe how you’re feeling in terms of how you’re not feeling and let the guilt and ambiguity do the rest.
“Nooo, I’m not mad at you for dragging us all the way downtown just because Todd was there. I’m not thrilled tbh, but not mad.”
If she’s really your friend she’ll know this means you’re livid.
Don’t be afraid of lowercase. tbh is way more casual than TBH. Just look at it. TBH says “I want you to notice my calculated use of this abbrev,” while tbh says, “I just stuck that in on the end there cause it’s like, whatever and I figured it might annoy you”.
Don’t even think about putting it on your Facebook status. Apparently there’s this thing where people (read: thirteen-year-olds) post statuses to the effect of, “Like my status for a tbh,” so their friends will write shit on their walls like, “TBH you’re funny and amazing and I’m so glad we’re friends.” Yeah…….just no.
We would keep going with this but we’ve got other shit to do TBH.