Texas Betch Gets a DWI, Buys Barbie Jeep Instead

By Queen Elizabetch

This biddie at Texas State, Tara, pimped her ride after getting a DWI and now drives a Barbie Jeep around campus. That is what half of a college degree looks like.

So homegirl got really fucking wasted at a Waka Flocka Flame concert (like, same - he didn't even play No Hands), and failed a breathalyzer test. Awkz. The police took away her driver's license, and her dad took away her car. It was like the opposite of an episode of My Super Sweet Sixteen.

Her dad gave her a bike to ride around school, which is absolute social suicide, but good try dad. Tara was not chill with being povo af in the bike lane, so she bought a $60, hot pink Barbie Jeep from Craigslist. Just for reference, for the same price as 3 boxes of Franzia she got a bitching, battery-powered child's toy.

Tara named the jeep Charlene, which is an old-school betchy name for a Southern debutante that may or may not have poisoned her prettier cousin. Obvi, she's gone totally viral, because of all the shitty, weird stuff that happens in Texas, this is fucking hilarious. Apparently, Tara makes her friends walk behind her when they're out together. Aka she literally created a motorcade for Charlene.

Mazel Tara. Texas Forever! 





Powered by Disqus




Forgot Your Password?

Create new account

User login