March 24, 2015
The weather gets colder, the holidays roll around, and suddenly every sorority girl and whore-next-door are in relationships. And not just any relationship, but the type of seasonal love that leads normally rational betches to lose their collectives minds. They post heavily-filtered pictures of couples ice skating to their Instagrams. They tweet about stupid country love songs and read every Buzzfeed article about the "signs of being in love."
If you have fallen prey to any of these symptoms the past few blistery cold months, never fear. You can be free.
The un-cuffing process can be arduous. It can get messy. But we have the steps to make sure you are free to be single and mingle for the upcoming beach season.
It's easy. Just make him hate you.