Regrettably, I found out that Tom Hiddleston joined Instagram last week. This should be excruciatingly mundane news for any normal person to hear, but considering that he's attached himself to my—and Kim's—arch nemesis, Taylor Swift, I became intrigued. Immediately I wondered if Tay Tay would follow her beau and if so, how long it would take for them to start exemplifying awful behavior like doing "Man Crush Monday" posts and existing. Well, it took Taylor 3 whole days to follow the man who one wore an "I <3 T.S." fruit of the loom tank top with her in public (ew!), and honestly her resistance to an immediate follow might be the most relatable thing she's ever done. Color me shocked.
Now, would I follow anyone that I'm dating back in 3 days? HEEELLLL NO. I would scour their feed and judge their use of hashtags, their shirtless to not shirtless post ratio, then I would make sure they aren't following porn stars, and then I would wait a solid 10 to 12 days. However, I'm not the woman who went out on 1 coffee date with Jake Gyllenhaal and lamented a "breakup" for like, 7 years afterwards, so I don't know how a brain like that even works.
Congrats you two! Now that it's Instagram official, maybe we can all stop obsessing over your relationship like a bunch of raging psychos!