December 2, 2013
So Hanukkah has arrived early and lucky for us, along with presents this year came every JAB's excitement that she could instagram pictures of her menorah/Thanksgiving dinner with the witty and original #Thanksgivukkah hashtag. In honor to celebrate the festival of lights with something other than lighting up a menorah of joints, we've created a list of our favorite jewfros in pop culture. Be it the actual impressive nature of the hairdo or just the fact that we love these funny Jews, everyone on this list has earned their keep in the world of frizzy unmanageable Jewish hair. Let's take a look.
Sure Larry is known for repeatedly talking about how bald he is and the issues that come with not having any hair, but let's not forget that this creator of Seinfeld used to somehow be even less sexy than his neurotic Curb Your Enthusiasm persona. I mean as much as we love Susie Green telling him to "get the fuck out of my house you bald four eyed jew face fuck", we might love this haircut even more.
As the only woman to grace this list, Monica Geller's Barbados Donna Summer looking Jewfro couldn't possibly be overlooked. It's called keratin Monica, check it out. Sure you can blame the humidity but I think Chandler said it best:
Monica: Everyone is leaving the here with someone else but us!
Chandler: That's not true, I came here with Monica and I'm leaving with Weird Al.
Before he was sending out unwanted pictures of his dick to unsuspecting female constituents, Tony Weiner was tearing shit up in his yearbook picture by sporting the least sexy jewfro on a 14 year old I've ever seen. With this look I'm sure his classmates called him Anthony Bush.
Sure he has one of the smaller Jewfros, but no list of Jewish guys in Hollywood would be complete without our beloved Adam Brody. Seth Cohen knows that the key to locking in a hot shiksa like Summer Roberts is brushing your fucking hair. Well done, Seth.
Jesse Eisenberg aka Mark Zuckerberg is one of the more boring members of the tribe. He speaks really quickly, rarely smiles, and quite franky isn't really funny enough to pull off the 6 inches of hair the rise above his forehead. Hey Jesse, a million dollars isn't cool. You know what's cool? A fucking haircut.
The picture above pretty much says it all. When you're as funny as Andy Samberg, we don't really give a shit if your dick is in a box or in us.
Sure Jonah Hill is pretty much on everyone's unfuckable list, but his hair deserves an Oscar of it's own. Also, this:
While we haven't seen this half jew's fro in action yet, rumor has it he's making a special fro-ed out cameo in Anchorman 2. All the more reason to check out the movie even if Drake will still be sans Degrassi wheelchair.
Not to pimp out every member of Judd Apatow's movie mafia but Seth Rogen's movie careers speaks for itself. When he's not calling Katherine Heigl out for being a bitch he can be seen giving bad advice to everyone and being gently romanced by James Franco.
Our favorite inappropriate Kazakhstakian doesn't disappoint with his Jewfro. Despite playing an anti-semetic homophobic, gypsy fearing tourist, Borat's hair shows us that many foreigners still manage to look like 1970's porn stars in 2013.