January 13, 2015
Four Vanderbilt football players are currently standing trial for gang rape, but the whole trial depends upon whether or not they were too drunk to have the "intent to rape," which is a little bit different than whether or not you were too drunk to have the intent to drunk text your ex. Both the defense and the prosecution have been busy looking for clues as to whether or not they were actually that fucked up and they've found the smoking gun: the correct spelling of quesadilla in a group chat means that he couldn't have been too drunk.
Tbh, these are Vanderbilt football players, I doubt they could spell quesadilla correctly when sober. He was drunk enough that his first priority was to drunk eat 1000 calories, but sober enough that auto-correct was able to recognize the word he was trying to spell.