July 23, 2014
Looking at a person's most used emoji list is like looking into one's soul in 2014. Emojis are like the new t-9 of texting and something I could never live without anymore. They’re the wifi to my data plan, the coffee to my morning, and the fashion tape to my deep v-cut dress. I really am #blessed for living at the same time as the Japanese programmers who created these little animations of expression but I have a few problems with them. Like why are there two camels for me to choose from but only one pair of heels?
And how often do we need to talk about Canada? Like can we please get a weed leaf up in here? This is after all. (Yes I know there are iPhones all over the world, I’m not mentally inept, but we’re the ones who started them so I think we get priority, RIP Steve Jobs – praying emoji)
And it’s 2014 I think its time to expand the races of our emoji people, having one white family and a man in a turban is a little Donald Sterling of you Apple.
My life wouldn’t be the same without the martini glass, crying laughing face, flame, waving hand, and dancing girls emoji but can we get some things like a fingers crossed emoji or a selfie emoji instead of having all four volumes of this rando book?
Or what about some product placement? Like an Uber, some Starbucks, or maybe even the Chanel logo? Emojis could stand to be a little more chic in my opinion. I mean Japan has an abundance of fake designer purses they rip off from every luxury brand across the world, I think they could make a few designer emojis.
All in all emojis are my ride or die, my caption on Instagram when I can’t find the words, and my faces of emotion when I’m feeling heartless or passive aggressive and trying to maintain friendships. But I hope along with the robots Apple will probably come out with soon, they also add some fundamental betch emojis.