What Happens When You Become Besties With Your Eskimo Sister

By Blackout Betch

Since we are naturally picky with our choices of bros (we wouldn’t touch 90% of the guys out there with a ten foot pole or even our 6 inch Louboutins), our selection pool is clearly limited. This creates many situations in which we find ourselves once having hooked up with a bro that a fellow betch has also hooked up with.

This shit is just bound to happen and there are many different ways it can end and be handled. Things can get real ugly, real quick if she’s the jealous and delusional type that thinks one hookup qualifies some kind of engagement. Clearly, she’s not a betch. 

Then there is the awkward middle phase where you know what went down and you both just don’t speak of it because this hook up possibly something you regretted the next Sunday morning. Some things, like ombré hair and live tweeting your night out, must die. This is one of those things.

While most hookups of this kind usually fall into the former two categories, there is something that happens occasionally that’s almost as rare as Jessica Simpson staying skinny: actually becoming besties with these betch as a result of the mutual hook up.

This is one of the weirdest phenomena ever, but betches who hook up with the same guy can actually become besties and bond over how shitty the bro was. This kind of scenario can only happen if the two betches are mature enough to realize guys can never play us at our own game. They may feel like hot shit for landing two of the hottest betches (you and your new bestie) in the same zip code, but in reality they are now the joke that will constantly make you two laugh.

Having this initial bond is one of the best catalysts for friendships between two betches. It usually begins through a drunken heart to heart. The next morning you realize that you and that this other ridiculously good looking girl (naturally the only kind you associate with) really talked about more than just making fake plans to catch up over coffee next week. Betches love talking shit and talking shit about bros is one of the best ways of bonding.

This friendship already has the right foundation because you have moved past the awkwardness of hooking up with the same bro. It has the potential of lasting a long AF time and you will always be able to look back 20 years from now and laugh over drinks about the now fat bro who brought you two together. He will have probably married some fugly dud by then who doesn’t get her eyebrows done and listens to Mariah Carey while you two betches continue to run shit. Karma.




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