September 1, 2015
Wedding season is in full swing as brides-to-be get ready for their rustic fairytale themed wedding and you get ready to spend hundreds on a look you can properly blackout at the open bar in, the thought crosses your mind: should I get married soon? As an independent betch who never settles, you and your closest besties have always laughed about getting married. Like, you know it’s going to happen eventually but just like the idea of our hair growing white when we’re old, you just can’t see it happening until you’re already Dame Judi Denched.
If you’re in a relationship in your twenties, chances are that marriage has crossed your mind at least once. But here’s why you should wait before jumping into marriage. Other than, of course, the obvious fact that you’re young and at your peak.
These days, married people have gotten really unoriginal. You can literally swap out your friends’ faces in every engagement photo and Facebook announcement, because that’s all everyone is doing – following a pre-written path. Like going to prom or graduating from college, getting married is just another milestone we do to fit in. Remember high school dance pics where everyone has the same backdrop and pose? That’s what all the Facebook engagement photos look like. And yet you’re supposed to think that marriage is special. Sorry, no. But as over it as we betches are, we love the idea of love, simply because it feels fucking good to be in love. And we’re all about that pleasure principle.
So if you’re into love but not into being a basic bitch, you can still get married, but just do it later. Because who cares? The longer you’re in love before you get married, the cooler your marriage will probably be. Kind of like the longer you work out through the summer, the better your Halloween body will be. It’s just logic.
The cool thing about marriage is that it’s supposed to be forever. Forever is a fucking long time, and if you’re already in a relationship, then the longer you wait to get married, the less you have to worry about it not working out. Because let’s face it, we go into every relationship with the foresight that most things don’t work out. But for the same reason we take that sixth or seventh shot of vodka even though we know we’ll likely be hungover AF the next day, we get into relationships. The reason is because it’s fun and it’s what we want to do. Also we’re probably already drunk in both those situations so why the fuck not.
Like a fine wine, marriage is one of those things that gets better the longer you wait. And spoiler alert betches, you’re not going to die alone. Because look at you. So don’t rush it and enjoy yourself, because once you’re married you have to worry about divorce and babies. Plus, weddings are much more fun when you can still catch a bouquet..