WTF Are Probiotics And Why Are They Trendy?

By Dom Betchignon

What the fuck are probiotics and why are they just as trendy this summer as overalls? Probiotics are a must have on the betch supplement list (behind Adderall obviously) and we're here to explain why so you don't have to like, read anything science. Ew. So, probiotics have like a zillion benefits that I could list off like in those boring commercials for Viagra and anti-depressants and shit. But these are the three I think are the most essential for a betch and why:

1. They regulate your digestion:

Having a well regulated digestion system is essential to weight loss. Especially if you're used to years of crash dieting. Probiotics are one of the best pills you can take to help regulate this aka aid in weight loss.

2. They lower blood pressure:

Even if you don't have high blood pressure now, with the amount of stress us betches endure over the years between social media anxiety, outfit selection, and finding a rich husband our blood pressure is bound to be higher than the crowd at a Dave Matthews concert in a decade or two.

3. Improve your immune system:

Probiotics help keep your whole body healthier by increasing your lymphocytes which are the most important factor in improving your immune system. So for our party lifestyle any help we can get in helping piece our immune system back together after the weekend benders is fine by me. So yay, I guess it's time to go eat a metric fuck ton of Greek yogurt.






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