July 22, 2015
Strangely beautiful bedfellows and married couple Johnny Depp and Amber Heard are in deep shit, dog shit that is.
The couple smuggled their two Yorkies, Pistol and Boo, into Australia in May without the proper papers and documents. There’s supposed to be a 10 day quarantine period for all animals brought into the country but Johnny and Amber DGAF about rules that apply to normal people so they just skipped it.
Johnny is in Australia shooting another fucking Pirates of the Caribbean movie. FYI, this is movie number five for the franchise even though everyone stopped giving a shit when Orlando Bloom peaced out after, like, movie number three.
The Australian Agriculture Minister was like, hey these dogs need to GTFO because they could have diseases and give them to our kangaroos and koala bears, so Johnny and Amber sent them back to Yorkie-ridden California, but that just wasn’t enough as far as reparations go, mate.
Amber has now been charged with two counts of illegal importing of animals and one count of producing a false document.
She’s scheduled to appear in court at the beginning of September. The maximum penalty is 10 years in prison and a fine of $75,000 for the smuggling, and a year in prison and $7,500 for the fake document. That’s a big punishment for caring just too hard about two #95 little dogs.
Grown ass man who dresses like a pirate, Johnny Depp, hasn’t been charged. He’s letting 29-year-old Amber handle the legal heat. Thanks, bae.