March 12, 2015
You may have noticed a semi-recent trend popping up in your Instagram explore page, Pinterest feed, bikini wax waiting room magazine, etc. It’s called Health Goth, and whether or not you recognize it by name, you would definitely recognize it by aesthetic.
This look is most commonly characterized by head-to-toe black sportswear, extreme resting betch face, and maybe some Jenny from the Block French braids. Although the term’s origin dates back to 2013 when two clove cigarette-smoking hipsters from Portland launched the “Health Goth” Facebook page (WHY), the style has only recently started bleeding into fashion blogs and retail.
The reason for this look’s creation was so that the Janice Ians of the world would feel more empowered to go to the gym and not be intimated by all the Lululemon-clad Betches texting on the stair climber. We’re not kidding, the hipsters said it. And while the whole concept is little TTH for our liking, there are some notable chic takeaways from this style. Every outlet from Marie Claire to NYLON has been talking about it for the last four months and even Alexander Wang adapted the look for his H&M collection, so just pop a Xany and trust us.
Just like your recent Tinder date, this trend probably won’t be around for long but that doesn't mean it isn't worth spending some money on the more wearable items. Yes, I know we’re approaching spring but many of you Betches are still freezing your nose jobs off on the East Coast, so take advantage of wearing black while you can. Before you know it, it’s the middle of August and you’re in the backseat of an Uber with a spray tan that’s melting onto the leather seats. Gross.
To take this trend from scary mall-dweller to sporty Betch think mesh panel tops, black Lycra (universally flattering even after one too many drunk brunches), flatform sneakers, and Adidas separates. Tip: if you walk into any Urban Outfitters you'll find Adidas's new collection styled pretty fucking cool.
Betches will stop wearing black when they invent a darker color. However, our only advice is to air on the side of caution to avoid looking full Goth. That shit looks cute on no one and people will think you don’t shave your armpits.