May 4, 2015
If you’ve come into contact with a male human in the last few days, chances are you’ve heard something about “The Fight.” Some of you might already know all about it, but I’m assuming most of you don’t know much about boxing, because ew. I’ve obviously never watched boxing because I have a life, but I’ve done my research (kind of), and here’s everything you need to know to make the bros happy.
Most of you probably know the basics by now, but I wouldn’t blame you if you don’t. The fight was between Floyd Mayweather, Jr. and Manny Pacquiao, who are pretty much the only two boxers that have mattered in the last ten years.
Mayweather and Pacquiao are easily the best/most important boxers of their generation, and they had never fought each other before Saturday. They were originally supposed to meet back in 2009, but they’re obviously pretty bitchy because it took them six years to agree on a contract. They both ended up getting almost $100 million just for showing up, so it seems like the contract worked out. A lot of people were calling it “The Fight of The Century,” which seems presumptuous considering it’s only 2015, but idk anything about boxing so who knows. Also, Mayweather has been under fire a lot because of repeated domestic violence allegations against him. This is totally not cool, and it’s understandable that a lot of people aren’t thrilled about paying an abusive husband to beat someone up in a boxing ring.
Because no one was making enough money on the fight, you had to pay $100 to watch it on your own TV. If this isn’t a familiar concept, it’s because pay-per-view is basically only used for boxing and porn. Obviously a lot of people wanted to watch the fight, which was a problem because the pay-per-view servers were so overloaded that people who had already paid for the match weren’t able to see it. Tbh this is a really shitty problem to have, especially when it’s literally the most predictable thing that could happen. They ended up starting the fight late so more people could watch, but regardless someone majorly fucked up.
I have no clue how the score system in boxing works, but Floyd Mayweather won by a unanimous decision, and he takes home the largest check in the history of sports or some shit. A lot of people were pissed about the fight not living up to expectations, and now there’s a story that Pacquiao might have been injured and been refused treatment before the fight. Who really knows, and who really cares? None of us will probably ever care about boxing again, so congrats on getting through this article. Now go think about royal baby names or something important.