Introducing Betches Love This Recipe: Zoodles

By Betchy Crocker

Don't get it twisted; I love pizza and wine as much as the next betch sliding into sweats for an "IDGAF" night, but sometimes a girl needs to branch out and expand her culinary prowess. Enter the zucchini noodle. This shit is stupid easy, stupid healthy, AND offers a chance to show off your cooking skills to any pro you may be looking to impress. Additionally, zucchini is like, really cheap (not that you need to eat like you're poor, but saving is important), and really easy to prepare. These so-called "zoodles" allow you to enjoy the whole “pasta” experience without the ab-killing carbs. Plus, you can top them with the homemade pesto recipe I've included or a super easy Caprese-like salad, also below. Wanna go to Taco Bell? Now you don't have to. You're welcome.

The Zoodles:

-       2 small or 1 medium zucchini

-       3 garlic cloves, minced

-       Salt & pepper, to taste

-       Extra virgin olive oil


Veggie peeler, Colander, skillet

Putting All This Shit Together

Using a vegetable peeler, mandolin, or spiralizer, turn the zucchini to create long spaghetti-like strips. Sprinkle the strips with a bit of salt and lay them in the colander. Go work out or Facebook stalk for like, 20 minutes. Returning to the zucchini, squeeze out as much liquid as possible. Meanwhile, heat some olive oil in a skillet. Add the garlic, and cook for about 30 seconds until golden, not brown (meaning you burned it, idiot). Add zucchini, and sauté until "zoodles" are slightly cooked; warm and more pliable – about 2-3 minutes. Remove from heat, season with salt and pepper to taste.

On to the toppings. Lighter sauces tend to do well on the zoodle since it's already a healthy vehicle. Plus, it’s another excuse for non-guilty toppings. Homemade pesto is STUPID easy and stores well, so you can make more than you need and keep it for awhile. That way, your fridge shame-eating at midnight has a better chance of NOT being a block of cheese.


-       1 cup basil leaves, torn

-       Extra virgin olive oil (the good shit, please)

-       Parmesan Cheese (the kind in the fancy cheese section; not near the American cheese-byproduct)

-       Pine nuts, toasted

-       Salt & pepper, to taste

Here's how we make pesto: Look at above ingredients - place in food processor. Blend. If you can’t handle this, then I can’t handle you.


-       3 Roma tomatoes (or grape tomatoes), halved

-       ½ cup basil leaves, torn

-       ½ cup bocconcini, halved (it's mozzarella, dumbass)

-       2 tbsps balsamic vinegar

-       2 tbsps extra virgin olive oil

-       Salt & pepper, to taste

Get a big bowl. Combine tomatoes, basil, and bocconcini. In a separate bowl or a mason jar, combine the vinegar, olive oil, salt and pepper – shake or stir until combined. Pour over the tomato mixture. Note: You don't have to use ALL that dressing ... but if you want to then whatever.

Use either the pesto or caprese to top your zoodles. If you’re really daring (omg so daring), top with both. Seriously, this is filling, nutritious, and visually appealing as fuck.




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