Hate To See It: Ciara Siding With Jesse And West Is Low-Key Pick-Me Behavior

I can’t lie, when Ciara took Amanda’s spot as the object of Jesse’s gratuitous flirty affections, I had to laugh. I support women’s rights and sometimes their wrongs, too, so what appeared to be a smidge of petty revenge against West seemed like fair game. But by the time Jesse was joking about West calling “dibs” on her, things started to feel a little… weird. Jesse’s betrothal to Lexi completely aside, I was more confused than Lindsay Hubbard looking for a sandwich about why Ciara entertained such low-brow buffoonery from a friend that she said she wasn’t actually interested in romantically. And as their dynamic became the hot topic of the not-so-cool summer, I came to a disappointing conclusion about Bed Bug #3’s role in the debacle: Ciara Miller is partaking in some serious pick-me behavior, I fear.

Ciara Miller Summer House Dating History

ciara miller austen kroll bravo

As someone who is, you know, a bit of an unlucky-in-love myself, I’ve had empathy for Ciara’s summer fling flops of yore. That’s why I’m old enough to remember how livid Ciara was at Lindsay for making out with Austen (women pursuing that man is worthy of a think piece in and of itself). Austen had already played Ciara like a game of cornhole on the previous season of Summer House, Southern Charm, and Winter House, so Ciara thought it was all uncool for a then-single Lindsay to rub salt in the wound by continuing the pre-existing situationship in front of her face. All of Ciara’s girlies rallied around her during season 6 to hit that point home, to the point that it led to a dinner brawl where Danielle and Ciara got into a physical altercation.

Ciara also read West in a town-square tribunal so badly that he knew even mentioning spending the night with another female human being would start World War III. So if Ciara expected Lindsay to show her some MO mercy and West to pay penance for a year-old situationship, why didn’t she inherently opt out of “stupid” hands-on “giggles” with Jesse to pay it forward to Lexi?

And before the ~men ain’t shit~ warriors (don’t worry, I’m one of you) fix their Twitter fingers to ask why it’s Ciara’s problem if Jesse is ruining his relationship. The simple answer is it’s not. That’s why Lexi read Jesse to fifth, not once, but three times, this season, because he’s the one who owed her more. (The only reason Lexi and Ciara finally talk about the elephant in the room is because Jesse got one last pot-stirring poke-in after she dumped him.)

But Ciara isn’t some hot model monolith whose behavior exists in a vacuum (FWIW, I think she’d agree she and vacuums don’t get along). Ciara acknowledged in a confessional that she knew it could look like she and Jesse were a thing, though she swore it was platonic. More pick-me-gregiously, she seemed to get a gay old chuckle when she voluntarily told Jesse, “Don’t let your situation stop you from finding your wife,” likely referring to West, and Jesse responded, “You mean, don’t let Lexi stop me from getting you?” Me? Personally?? I’m getting the friendship ick immediately for barking like a dog, not grinding on the dude on the dance floor to reward shitty boy behavior.

It’s obvious Ciara could’ve chosen to take Jesse and didn’t (not unlike Lexi, who also eventually passed on the generous opportunity). So, can someone PLEASE explain to me what she got out of acting like she’s tryna get chose?

What is considered “pick-me” behavior?

Ciara Jesse Summer House

Like, yes, sure, Ciara didn’t owe it to Lexi to shut Jesse down, but why were idle fondling, empty flattery, and cringe Instagram comments something Ciara valued over making any girl look stupid, let alone her younger, more naive roommate? And after her come-to-Jesus with Jesse, what did Ciara stand to lose by pulling Lexi aside to tell her it’s only Jesse she would need to be worried about? Even just throwing in some low-stakes girl’s girl assurance during one of the millions of times Lexi gave the group a ridiculous relationship update would’ve gone a long way.

Merriam-Webster defines a pick me as “a slang term for a person, usually a young woman, seen as behaving in a contemptible way for attention and approval, usually from male peers.” TBH, the label usually lands on ladies actively dunking on other women, but in my book, passive participation counts too. So, while some may hate to hear it, I believe Ciara’s summer ‘tude falls deep in pick-me territory, especially considering I have huge contempt for the number of times she allowed Jesse Solomon to bare his entire oral cavity to banter with her.

Are Gabby and West friends? Summer House Freedom Dinner Fight Explained

For all their lamenting of how unwelcoming Lindsay was to them, Ciara and the Bed Bugs gave Gabby Prescod a pretty frosty welcome. In her freshman season, Gabby paid party planners to arrange her disco party. When the event didn’t quite hit, the girls, well, shit on it. Ciara specifically went on to call Gabby “surface-level,” meaning superficial and not “down to earth,” ~whatever that means~ coming from a perfectly coiffed reality TV star woman who has carried her massive suitcases full of expensive clothes on camera maybe once.

Fast forward to the Freedom Dinner, where West steps in as an amateur beatboxer, dropping snide comments of support to back up Jesse as he raps excuses about how he treated Lexi. West grumbles, “he wants to hang out with you too much, but he treats you like shit?? It’s like contradictory” (it actually objectively isn’t), and Gabby tells him to STFU. So, color me surprised when Paige nudges West to “speak up,” co-signed by Ciara. Ciara has been shutting West’s “bitch moves” down all summer long, but when Gabby pipes up (to make sure Lexi and her lip liner are heard), Paige, Ciara, and Amanda are suddenly clocking in as West’s security guards? It looked like that side of the table was eager to have a dude jump down Lexi’s throat so Ciara didn’t have to, and, frankly, it doesn’t get more pick me than that.

I don’t think I’ll find a recap of Ciara’s borderline glee when West snaps at Gabby (“the fucking adlibs with you, fucking one second”) in The Book of Girl Code. Are we really supposed to believe Ciara is suddenly invested in the character development of a man she hasn’t made eye contact with for three months? The way she metaphorically breaks her back to pat West on his for “doing a good job” by “coming for Gabby”… ya, she’s never clearing the guy’s girl allegations in this house.

The truth is, if Ciara, Amanda, or Paige were on the receiving end of a sliver of the way Jesse treated Lexi in the house, they’d be stringing Jesse up by his dirty toes (no, not literally). Amanda says as much; that time, she finally threw Lexi a bone by telling her some of what Jesse had been saying after kickball. If having a “hater ass boyfriend” isn’t good enough for Paige, why is Ciara A-okay with Jesse being, like, exactly that to Lexi? Because Lexi isn’t in the Bed Bugs inner circle, Paige had to convince Ciara to be “nice” when confronting Lexi, and the way she said it seemed to be about optics, so I guess that’s why Gabby was a safe target. Paige says they’re “for the girls,” but IDK, it seems like the Bed Bugs are for their particular girlfriends.