Zac, It’s Clear You Need More Than Couples Therapy

If you’ve been keeping up with The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, you know that each wife has their own unique relationship with their respective husband. And after the episode where the wives go to a Chippendales show during their Las Vegas trip, you probably also now know that some of these relationships are quite toxic.

On a show where there’s soft swinging and ketamine use, you’d think that a trip to a male burlesque show would be one of the softer aspects of these “secret” lives. But after watching Jen and her husband Zac argue about her going (even though she actually didn’t see the show — she left), it’s pretty clear that there’s some blatant misogyny going on in that relationship.

Jen considers herself one of the more conservative friends in her MomTok group (also known as one of the “saints” rather than the “sinners”), and after episode seven it’s clear that a lot of this has to do with pressure from her husband Zac. Although he originally says he’s fine with her going, suddenly he calls her back and absolutely freaks out on the phone. Then, even after she leaves the venue and goes home with two of the other wives, he hit her with a string of text messages rather than meet with her in person or even answer the damn phone.

Zac, I’m going to need you to lean in a little closer here when I say this: Seek some help. Listen, it is totally okay to have your own boundaries as a couple. Some people aren’t cool with their partners going to strip clubs or burlesque shows — whatever, everyone is entitled to their own relationship rules. But degrading your wife and calling her names because you feel uncomfortable is ridiculous and manipulative behavior, especially considering she didn’t even know she’d be going to Chippendales anyway. Also, questioning your entire marriage over something like that is super gaslight-y. Not only did Jen have to leave a venue she was at with her other married friends, but she was sobbing. And it’s not like he stopped once he knew she left — he kept piling into her.

Image Credit: Courtesy of Disney

It’s not surprising to see people who adhere to more traditional standards end up perpetuating some sort of misogyny, but the entire point of The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives (aside from being chaotically entertaining) is to show how these women are paving their own path despite the traditional customs of their faith. And Zac is being totally misogynistic by implying that Jen joining her friends at a burlesque show reflects poorly on her character or her family. Here’s an idea, Zac: Let’s take all those thoughts you poured into Jen and channel them into some therapy. Sure, technically you and Jen are already in couples therapy but I’d go as far as to say you’d benefit from some therapy on your own. At least that will give Jen one hour of her life back!