We naively assumed that the entirety of Taylor Swift’s The Tortured Poets Department would be about her split with Joe Alwyn, but Blondie surprised us with a whole lot of songs about someone whose name rhymes with Patty Mealy… and she also threw in some Tayvis tunes for us! This woman works ridiculously fast, but her Swifties work even faster. We’re already super busy figuring out which is song was inspired by which muse. If you know your Taylor history (I’ve personally been following her career for literally 18 years), those identities become clear after a listen or two.
So far, it’s seeming like “The Alchemy” on TTPD and “So High School” on the second batch of songs are about Taylor’s new public relationship with Travis Kelce. Both songs have several blatant sports references that make the subject somewhat obvious — I daresay Matty and Joe have never thrown a football in their lives. I could be wrong, but I seriously doubt it. Let’s embrace the few happy tunes and analyze the TTPD songs about Travis Kelce!
Which Tortured Poets Department Songs Are About Travis Kelce?
In “The Alchemy” Taylor references football, singing: “So when I touchdown, call the amateurs and cut them from the team / Ditch the clowns, get the crown / Baby I’m the one to beat / Because the sign on your heart said it’s still reserved for me / Honestly, who are we to fight The Alchemy?” Yes, the people on social media who were waiting for a “touchdown” lyric got exactly what they wanted. It’s on the nose, but that’s what makes it iconic.
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And in “So High School” the queen sings about how Travis makes her feel like she’s a teenager falling in love at high school. She writes, “I’m watching American Pie with you on a Saturday night / Your friends are around so be quiet / I’m trying to stifle my sighs / ‘Cause I feel so high school every time I look at you.” Aww. If there’s one thing Taylor adores, it’s high school imagery. And towns. There’s always a small town.
She also low-key references an old interview he did about her! Many years ago, Travis played a “Fuck, Marry, Kill” game, and Taylor was one of the women he was asked about. He chose to kiss her back then. In “The Alchemy,” Taylor asks if he’s going to “marry, kiss, or kill” her. “It’s just a game, but really,” she emphasizes. My head is exploding.
What Has Travis Said About The Tortured Poets Department?
The football star weighed in on his girlfriend’s new album back in February. “I have heard some of it,” he revealed at the time during a Super Bowl press event. “It is unbelievable. I can’t wait for her to shake up the world when it finally drops.” Consider the world thoroughly shook. Seriously though, I’m already looking forward to the full Travis album that’s probably coming out next year.