A Formal Plea To Make Maria The Next Bachelorette

I could not be more thrilled that Joey didn’t pick Maria. As much as I adore the relatively simple-minded but charming tennis pro, we all know he’s no match for the new Queen of Bachelor Nation. Maria was quite literally put on this earth to be the bachelorette. She’s an effortless underdog/protagonist, stunning, charismatic, witty, feisty, brutally honest… the list goes on and on. I didn’t think it was possible for me to stan her more, and then she slayed the house down boots in the “Women Tell All” episode. My girl talked her shit but also managed to take the high road and show her bullies (ahem, Sydney and Lea) some grace. So yeah, she’s definitely better than me.

I would genuinely give anything — except my extensive Kate Middleton notes — for Maria to be on my screens more. Those boys would be quaking in their boots every rose ceremony and date, and there wouldn’t be one boring second all season. As stans, it’s time to make our voices heard and demand a star with an actual personality. Here are all the reasons Maria absolutely must be the bachelorette. ABC, I’d advise you to take this into consideration.

Maria Is Naturally Entertaining

She’s an icon, she’s a legend, and she is the moment. That’s just not a controversial statement. Almost every memorable moment from this season of The Bachelor involves Maria. Yes, she found herself at the center of preposterous Sydney drama for one, but she also slyly seduced Joey by changing into something “more comfortable,” taught him sexy French phrases, and always kept an impressive level of banter going.

She Doesn’t Take Any Bullshit

I actually died during “Women Tell All” when Sydney said that they just have different ways of communicating and Maria replied, “Yeah, I speak the truth and you make up lies.” Ended her. This is a fierce woman who’s always gonna stand up for herself and call out other cast members when necessary. Despite Sydney, Lea, and Jess ganging up on her throughout the season, Maria never stooped down to their level. She just repeatedly defended herself and pointed out when they were blatantly lying. Snaps.

She Wants Both Fame And A Man

Nick Lachey would be proud because Maria joined The Bachelor for the right reasons! Kind of. It’s very clear that she had real feelings for Joey and wanted to pursue a serious relationship with him. However, she also appears to be super comfortable with fame and navigating drama on camera. As a viewer, I truly believe that Maria wants to find the love of her life, and I can appreciate that she wants to be a star and have a long-lasting, exciting career in Hollywood. (‘Cause same.)